Laundry Chute
 

"Aw, what?" Blair ducked his head and a shoulder into the narrow opening. He could see the problem: someone's sheets had gotten jammed in the chute, blocking the way for the bag. He reached in, the fingers of his hand just grazing the edge of the material.

...45...46...47...48... He wriggled in further, pulling the sheets out of the way and tucking them against his chest as he gave the bag another shove. He heard it sail cleanly down the chute this time, landing at the other end with a soft thud.

Mission accomplished, he tried to pull back out and discovered a slight problem.

He was stuck

"Oh man."

Blair felt a slight breeze against his face as someone opened a door at the other end Hope I gave you enough time, Jim

Obviously not. He heard the squeal of brakes, oddly refracted through the metal chute, then Charlie's excited yelling.

"Hey, Detective! Yeah! That was the car! That was it!"

Oh man, I better get down there before Jim kills him. Blair tried to wriggle out again and only succeeded in jamming himself in further. "Aak." Deep breath, stay calm, ease out. The sheets pressing up against his face were really starting to smell...

Reaching out awkwardly with his trapped hand in an attempt to move the sheets, he banged his elbow on the side of the chute and howled in pain. "Ow! Man," he muttered, shifting around. "This is so not fun." Using his fingers and his chin, Blair managed to work the sheet away from his body, staring wide-eyed as a pair of leopard skin Speedos fell out from the sheets an inch away from his nose. "Oh, gross" he jerked his head back in revulsion and smacked it against the top of the chute. That is it. I am not staying in here. He tried to tug himself out, bumping the back of his head against the metal frame.

"Ouch. Dammit," no doubt about it. Stuck solid. "Jim?" he winced as his voice bounced around the chute. He just hoped his partner could hear it. "Jim? Jim, man, I need help."

His partner's voice floated up towards him. "Yeah? What's up, Chief?"

"I'm uh..." Blair sighed. Time to bite the bullet. "I'm stuck in the laundry chute."

"The WHAT?"

"The laundry chute. Look, the money got stuck, then I reached in to get it free, then I got stuck and - look, does it really matter? " He could hear them laughing at the other end. "Come on man, this isn't funny! Can you please come and pull me out?" He jerked futilely at the edges of the chute. "Or at least get these leopard Speedos outta my face."

He heard Jim howl with laughter, then Charlie's high pitched giggle. Great This was big time humiliation. "Come on, Jim," he pleaded. "Please?"

"I'll be up in a minute." Jim got out. "Hang on, Chief."

"Thanks." He scuffed his feet against the carpet, blowing futilely at the Speedos, trying the puff them down the shaft. "I really appreciate this."

An age later, he heard the door behind him open, and Jim crack up again. "Sandburg -"

"Don't say it Jim. Just get me outta here." He felt strong hands grab his jeans and start pulling. "Ow!" he yelled, feeling his jeans slip down a little. "Man, watch where you're grabbing me!"

Jim let go and stood back, hands on hips. "Do you want out or not?"

" 'Do I want out?' " Blair thumped the side of the chute with his free hand, wincing as it boomed in the confined space. "Of course I want out. You think I like having my head stuck in someone else's washing?"

"Then quit complaining, or I'll push you out the other end."

Blair paused in his frantic squirming. "Uh, Jim, man, I don't think that'd be a good idea. Look, I'm sorry, can you just pull me out? Please?" He felt the hands on his jeans again, then a tugging. He pushed with his free hand at the wall, trying to add leverage.

"The things I do for your, Sandburg..." Jim grumbled good-naturedly, tugging harder. "Looks like you're stuck good. Give me a hand, Charlie."

"Yep, ok." Another pair of hands were added and Blair groaned. Could this get any WORSE?

He felt a slight give, and pushed harder with his free hand. "Hang on, man, I can feel some give, I can feel some -" A final yank and Blair was free. "Oof!" His momentum carried him halfway across the room, collapsing in a tangle of arms and legs. Sitting up, he gingerly patted himself down. "Thanks."

"No problem." Jim grinned over at Charlie. "Didn't see that one, did you, Merlin?"

Charlie held his hands up in front of him. "I can't control the hits," he defended.

"Yeah." Jim slapped his partner on the back. "Come on, Chief. We have a bad guy to catch."

All Content Copyright © 2001 Taleya Joinson
Last modified: November 12, 2010